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“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law.” – Galatians 5:22-23

I still remember watching Mike Tyson come unglued with frustration in the 1997 WBA Heavyweight title fight, biting a chunk out of Evander Holyfield’s ear. Once one of the most feared boxers in history, Tyson lost control of his emotions, derailed his career and almost destroyed his life. While his story is extreme, it’s a great example of the power emotions can have in determining our direction.

Today, student-athletes are under more mental and emotional pressure than ever before. That’s not just hyperbole. A recent survey published by the American Psychological Association found that—for the first time ever—kids are more stressed than adults. Kids are being treated for anxiety and depression, yet less than one in 10 parents think their kids are struggling.

The sports world can fuel that emotional mess. An increasing number of kids and coaches are losing control of their emotions on the court and in everyday life. Below are several issues at the root of what I call the “Emotional Energy Drain."

• Our emotional energy tanks are empty. When an athlete comes unglued, their performance falls apart. Negative emotions are both unproductive and destructive. They’re like holes in our bucket, draining our ability to handle stress and hurting our performance and relationships. We are either “out of control” (empty) or “under God’s control” (full), which is described in Romans 8:5-6 (NIV): “Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.”

• When we’re out of control, we’re operating on our own strength. We can push so hard all the time that we “redline” and never recover, constantly feeling drained and exhausted. When our emotional energy tank is empty, we respond out of fear, anger, frustration or anxiety. All those emotions ravage the joy of playing sports.

• When we’re under God’s control, we are “ruled” by the peace of Christ. That peace allows us to stand in the storm. When our emotional energy tank is full, we’re far more likely to respond with courage, empathy, peace and joy. Fruit always starts at the root. When our spiritual roots go deep, we gain the wisdom and nourishment necessary to bear the fruit of positive, godly emotions—no matter our circumstances.

• Energy impacts emotion. Dr. Jim Loehr, an author and co-founder of the Human Performance Institute, says our emotions are greatly affected by sleep, food and focus. I can personally testify to his findings in my own life.

Ultimately, the end goal with emotions is to have the flexibility to respond in a godly way regardless of circumstances, and having the resiliency to bounce back from disappointment, frustration and failure. Start with the steps below focused on sleep, food and focus to fill your emotional energy tank, and see if you notice a positive difference in your emotional health.

SLEEP – We need regular rest and recovery. Most of us sleep 40 hours less than we need each month. Sleep is an active process that restores and rebuilds our health. Rest brings refreshment.

• Strive to sleep eight hours each night in a cool, dark room.

• Unplug all technology at least 30-60 minutes before bed.

FOOD – Food affects our mood. When we eat foods that are heavily processed and high in saturated fats, refined sugars or salt, we are destined to perform poorly. We end up less energetic, sick and moody. Unhealthy foods lead to unhealthy emotions.

• Eat a plant-based diet with plenty of vegetables, fruits and whole grains.

• Avoid snack foods, sugar and late-night binge eating by eating smaller meals and healthy snacks.

FOCUS – Our thoughts drive our emotions and behavior. Too often, we are buzzing with noise and distractions. Keep in mind that Jesus led out of the quiet. He started with silence and let the Father fill Him for the day.

• Give God more of your attention; shut off all distractions and stop multi-tasking. Be fully present for each person and task.

• Put God first on your calendar each day by starting in the Word and prayer.

How Full Is Your Emotional Energy Tank?

1. Do you get enough sleep each night, or are you drained due to a lack of rest?

2. Are you focusing more on God and His character, or you and your challenges?

3. Are you eating healthy foods that lead to steady moods and energy, or are you giving your body junk food?

4. What’s one action step you could take in each area to fill your emotional energy tank?

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